The northern winds are blowing again.

That’s what DBS always says when she’s referring to my temper. Apparently, my vibes are so powerful that they give frostbite to those unfortunate enough to provoke my ire.

Shouting and screaming is just so…undignified. It’s also tiring. Very often, it’s easy enough to know what the other party means. There can be lots of verbal missiles being hurled around, but there’s always a main message to listen out for. The bottomline, if you will.

Maybe I don’t like to waste time, but once that bottomline is out in the open, it’s easy enough to settle and most of the time, I cut to the chase. My terms are these, so take it or leave it. There’s always room for negotiation, but the bottomline of both parties should be met.

When I left K***, some friends asked me whether the company gave me a counter offer. To be honest, that didn’t cross my mind because money is not my bottomline (hah, I love this word!). Do I have responsibilities that require a consistent income? Yes. Can I do with more money? Of course. There’s something more than bread and butter that calls to me though.

There’s also a portion of me that thinks as the Employer, and somehow, I would be wary of the Employee who stays just because I increased his/her remuneration. The assumption here is that the Employer is paying according to/above market rate, of course. It’s very common, I know. Loyalty to the company is a relic of the past…I would argue that there are some fundamentals that companies have gotten wrong in the first place, but education, politics, and the general global economic/technological climate have also contributed greatly to this lack of sense of belonging to a company. So is there hope for loyalty (to a company) yet? There’s always hope, just as there’s always a choice. Mind you, I am NOT referring to blind loyalty and coerced harmony at all costs.

One of my tutors once related this story about a particular employee who made unreasonable demands on his company, and I told DBS that my response would have been,

‘The door, as you know it to be, is still there.’

A lot of times, DBS and friends tell me that I’m ‘scary’ because of my ‘cold’ responses. Hmm…guess ‘nice’ will definitely not be included in my epitaph.

A couple of days ago, this man tried to jump my queue at a fast-food restaurant. You know what the last straw was? The girl at the cashier wanted to go ahead and take his order! My response? Well, man took a step back in the end and girl’s smile froze. I did NOT scream or make a scene though. It was more like, ‘I came here first.’ There was also inevitably, the implicit command in my gaze that went, ‘And you better serve me first, or there would be hell to pay’.

Sigh…why, why, WHY do they have to turn me into this witch that goes around terrorising people?

It’s kind of cold tonight, so maybe that’s why I started thinking about Sunshine, and how different our ways of dealing with things are. Maybe it’s time to get in touch again…