When I started this blog, I promised myself that I would write only positive things here. I don’t mean to do that by blatantly lying to myself and to my friends, or decorating meanness with sugary fluff, etc. I just wanted to write about my experiences, my feelings and ideas, as they are to me, in a way that is enlightened and positive. Even when the experiences are bad, and God knows we all have them in our lives. I’m not a very demonstrative person, and this is one of the ways in which I can reach out to people I care about. Perhaps one day, when I’m confident enough, I’ll open this to the public and reach out to the masses.
Lately, I find myself sucked in by negative energies, and being caught up in their whirlpool…it’s extremely challenging to stay enlightened and positive.
DBS, thank you for being so patient, and well, for just being you. You’re my ‘bestest’ friend ever, and we’d probably work better with each other than with anybody else. Don’t know how that business thing will turn out, but will talk to J**** when I see him this time. Ha, if it takes off nicely with time, I’ll probably want a commission, and then venture into some other things. On another note, maybe things are not so clear with R** R**, but no use worrying about things when they’re beyond your control, right? For what it’s worth, you’ll always have me to help you up should things don’t work out. But I’m actually quite hopeful lah. Instinct…Oh, just don’t do embarrassing things like hold my hand as we RUN across the road!
My dear at work, well, I think God has a plan when he put us in each other’s path. Every time I’m stuck with stupid, self-defeating thoughts regarding work, you’d say something and BOOM!, I’d wake up and be more enlightened. Usually, it’s a thinking or idea that’s been brewing in me subconsciously, but I guess they just need validating, and…well, what can I say? We definitely have good chemistry.
D** too, keep seeing your messages one to two days later after they’re sent because I haven’t been logging on so much recently. Then when I see them, sometimes, just not in the mood to reply. So sorry…Sometimes, you’re so sweet it kinda scares me, honestly. But I know you care for me, and I’m thankful for that. You’re a great guy with a heart that’s bigger than anyone I know, serious. I know I need to learn tolerance and humility from you, dude.
J* S****, you’re so far away and we didn’t talk much, but what we did talk about was kind of like a dream because everything felt so unreal. But I still remember our conversation very clearly. Regardless of my excellent memory, I believe that you appeared in my life at that point in time because I needed something to be pointed out to me. It’s really weird because I’m not even sure whether I can recognise you immediately when I see you again (and I think it should be true in your case for me too!), but I’m really grateful for the laughter you brought to my life at unexpected moments. Little things to you, perhaps, but well, precious to me because they were unexpected…and definitely needed.
New directions in various aspects of my life? Yeah, not all is clear yet, but at least, I seem to have accepted that a change of mindset is in order.