Didn’t want to deface your blog page, so am writing about my appreciation, etc. on my own page instead. It was then that I realised that I didn’t contribute a single article for May! Bloody barnacles! I was busy with back pay (tough work, you know, and not because I made mistakes in April, but for reasons I can’t control), entertaining/discussion with the bosses, interviewing candidates for the F.S.E. position, etc.
As I said in my comment to your article, thanks for the excessive complement. <blush…but actually very happy lah> You’re right, actually, about that part of those being little things to me. 你也知道啦，你的人傻傻的，所以我不怕你拿了我的钱就跑掉。呵呵呵。。。Even if I told you that I don’t expect you to return me the money, I’m sure you would, even if it’s in installments. Seriously, if I didn’t have that amount to spare, you can bet I would have kept my mouth shut. I also have financial responsibilities, but…you know, it’s really a great pity that one can’t better oneself because of these reasons. I truly believe in the human potential, so even if it’s not you, I would probably do the same, assuming that the person passes my friendship test.
Erm, if your ego just got deflated because you don’t feel so special after reading the last paragraph…too bad!
As for finding somebody to share my life with…thanks for your well wishes. These things are really beyond my control though. Controllable to a certain extent, yes, but still…Go out more and meet more people, right? I know, but you are also well aware that I can be quite difficult to get along with, right? People always say that I set my standards very high, but it’s not that, I think. I don’t expect him to be rich, handsome, famous, or talented…but he must have his own mind, and it must be an open mind. I can’t put it down in words accurately, but often…there’s just something missing in perfectly fine guys that I meet. Maybe it’s my experiences in life thus far, so if you put it down in age, I may already be in the 60s zone. Hahaha…not talking about cynicism or being negative here, or having an old-fashioned mind-set. DBS, being my sister, said that, ‘They can’t match up to you’. Well…I just think that I’m always growing and developing, so I’d hope for my other half to do the same too. If not, it’d be very difficult to sustain the relationship. In short, you can’t blame me for not trying, but maybe the timing is not right, or a different path is set out in life for me.
Loneliness does strike sometimes, of course, but at the end of the day (or night), I’m still me…with the potential to change (others), the choice to be happy no matter what the circumstances, the chance to grow, give and receive love.
After all, love, despite all the focus on romantic love, is so much more than love for just one other person.